So Christmas was here. Wasn't really looking forward to it much like I normally was, I knew it was going to be hard not seeing Mom there.

After dinner, we gathered in the living room to exchange gifts. My grandma handed me a box and told me these were for me. It wasn't uncommon for her to give me a few little extra things for Christmas, so I just thought that it was something from her.

I went over and sit on a spot by the tree, there were over 30 people in the room, so you cop-a-squat where you can. Started looking around while everyone opened their presents and saw my cousin getting teary and looking at me. I knew it was hard for everyone not just me.

I looked down at the box and realized that they were not presents from my Grandma. They were gifts that my mom had already bought and wrapped before she passed away. I immediately started crying when I saw her handwriting. She had beautiful penmanship. Something that I definitely didn't get from her. There were several things in the box. There was a Rachel Ray cookbook, she knew I was messing with new recipes and trying new foods. There were several packages that were wrapped and labeled.

The first thing that I opened was something that she had gotten me but it didn't come in until after she had passed, so my Grandma wrapped it for me. A few weeks before she passed away I had gotten an AVON book in our mailbox. I flipped thru it and saw a Smurfette watch. It made me smile and instantly reminded me of being young watching the SMURFS on Saturday mornings. So that night when I talked to her, I told her if she ever ordered me anything from AVON again, this watch would be perfect. See my mom was always getting me little rings or jewelry or lipstick from AVON, so I knew that she would probably be getting the same book if she didn't have it already. Apparently she had ordered it for me but was never able to see me wear it.
The next thing in the box was a package that said it was from Toby & Moses. Toby is my grandma's dog and Moses was my mom's cat. It wasn't unusual for me to get gifts from the pets...they were part of the family too! They were 2 giant Sudoku puzzle books. She had mentioned these to me months before and asked if I knew how to do those crazy number puzzles. I said I loved them and she said she had some books someplace and if she ever found them she would give them to me. I have been doing them ever since, being sure to do each one completely before moving onto the next. I want them to last as long as they can.

The final package was a long box. On the label it said:
To: Mendie Jo
You are the best thing that ever happened to me. I love u!!!
From: Mom

My heart broke. I had gotten dozens of gifts before with little heartfelt messages on them, but this by far touched me the most of anything I had ever gotten. I just held it in my hands and started crying even more. Who knows how long she had that package wrapped in her room. I couldn't bring myself to open it, I didn't want to damage the package because of what it symbolized. I waited until I got home later that night and carefully opened the package, being sure not to tear the label, in front of the tree. Thru the tears I opened up a beautiful bracelet that she had gotten me. While it was a very pretty bracelet, my eyes continued to gravitate to the words that were on the package.

I know there was no way for her to know how much those words would have meant to me when I opened that package on that day. And that is what made them even more special. That she wrote them on a Tuesday when she decided to wrap Christmas presents. They were just what was in her heart at that very minute, the same as every minute and she wanted to make sure that I knew it. I am just sorry that every other package or card that she had given me wasn't as appreciated as this one was. I always was thankful but wish that I was better at telling her while I had the chance. I keep those labels and look at them often. Every time I look at them I say another thank you to the mother that loved me every minute of everyday....and tell her I love her too.